12/21/11

Judged:


You and I have been together for more than three years now. That's a lengthy amount of time, and you would think, time to learn and trust someone.

Here's a few facts we need to get out there:

1.) I am not with you for money. I do not ask you for money. I do not ask you for fancy or expensive things. It's been 3 years, and if you tell me one more time 'sometimes I wonder if you are with me just for money' then I will walk out that door for good. If I hear you tell me that I need to 'contribute financially' one more time, I will smack you. All of my paychecks go into OUR account, which means you have full control over every cent I make. I hope I made this clear the last time you told me this, and I reminded you that you have ALL my money.

2.) You are not perfect. You nag when I leave a fork in the sink, but I should not be affected when you leave moldy plates and cups upstairs for a week at a time. And yes, it is the same. It bothers me as much as my fork in the sink bothers you, I just don't make a big deal out of it like some people do.

3.) You have bad days. Don't blame me when you are stressed out from work (and yes, you do get that way sometimes) and don't ask me if I need food when you have a bad day and want me to feel that it's really me that's having a bad day. You are human. You are not perfect. You have just as many flaws as me, and honestly, many are EXACTLY the same. I've just learned how to communicate with you when you have them, instead of blaming my bad days on you, and making you feel that you were at fault for causing it.

4.) If you are going to dish out sarcasm, be prepared to get it in return. As I walked in from work with an opened egg nog, you asked 'does it have rum in it?' Assuming it was a joke, I replied with one 'yeah, we keep it stocked at work'. I expected a chuckle from my reply, and instead you got mad at me, once again. It was a joke from the moment you opened your mouth.

5.) There is usually more than one way to do things. Most all things. I may do something different than you. It does not make my way wrong. It does not make your way wrong. Don't criticize my way because it is different than yours. Do not make me do something your way because you are convinced it's so much better than mine. Just let me be me.

6.) When I get sick, please do not get mad at me. When you are sick, please do not get mad at me. I no longer dread getting sick simply because it's a miserable feeling, but I know that because I act differently as a result of not feeling well, you will likely get upset with me, and tell me I'm in a bad mood, and grumpy, and it makes me feel that much worse because now you are mad at me. Treat me like I treat you when you don't feel well. With love, compassion, and respect. I promise, it's not hard, and it is very much appreciated.