It's strange.....
Like I should have carried her bed upstairs last night when I went to bed. But I didn't. I couldn't bear to even roll over and look down, where she used to sleep on the floor right next to me. The past couple years I had her sleep within arms reach to me, so that I could keep a closer eye on her - and for the past couple weeks Taco Jones wouldn't leave her side at night. If I didn't put his bed right next to hers, he would sleep on the floor. It's like he knew - he was probably more prepared for this than I was.
I know it was for the best, but I just feel so empty, so alone without her here. I want more than anything to just hold her one more time and kiss her little furry cheeks, but I know I wouldn't want to let go if I did. I'm not good with letting go in general.
Mama misses you boo......
hope you enjoyed your first night free of pain - hope you saw and heard lots of great things.
xo
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